Proud of myself

Tuesday 14th May 2019 – Diary

On Sunday I met this is beautiful Chinese lady by chance on the Tube (London Underground). She was so beautiful my type of woman. We quickly talked and I gave her my Instagram.

I am just dying for her to contact me now. She is doing a film degree. Amazing!

Yesterday! I ate 95% pot of Congee, Rice Porridge. This is the first time I succeeded.

 

 

Getting to Grips

Tuesday 5th March 2019 – Diary 

The last three weeks I have allowed my emotions to rule me, ❤ heart and mind 🤯. I have realised that my son
🙎‍♂️ would want me to be strong 🏋️‍♀️💪 and ‘keeping’ it together. 🙎‍♂️ He does not understand 💭why I do not live 🏚with him. He may be thinking Daddy is happy 😀 where he is? I must show him that he is right.

I only see him two times a year and I need not to be a wreck but a happy person. Break ups are difficult. But it is the best for him, I know and I accept.

So now I need to start planning my life and become happy. 😀

I’m so lost!

Sunday 3rd March 2019 – 18:35 – Diary 

I am totally lost at the moment. One minute I am married, able to talk to my wife about the important and not so important things. I then find that a court had banned me from talking to her. There is so many things I want to express. My gratitude for her bringing a beautiful son, child into this world.

I want to express the many things that I should have done as her husband and as the father but I failed and cannot express any of this.

I am so happy that people have the love of their lives, but it rips me apart. I can’t cope with weekends when I see families together. I miss my family.

Will I ever be happy and in love again?! I find it hard to see.

I feel so miserable
😒😕😰